Friday, December 24, 2010

Whoops, wrong movie

So I made a mistake.  The movie I had lined up on the old dvr was Don't Answer the Phone, not He Knows You're Alone.  It's easy to see how the titles could be confused in my mind.  What a treat Don't Answer the Phone was.  Not quite the type of slasher movie I'm watching to research the paper I want to write.  However, as far as b-pictures from the 70s and 80s go (this one was released in 1980), this movie is a fucking masterpiece.  It's sleazy, it's filled with nudity and it's got an ace synthesizer soundtrack.  Even the normally tolerant John Kenneth Muir has nothing but bad things to say about it.  Muir sometimes reveals his lack of knowledge regarding the production of b-movies.  He calls Don't Answer the Phone boring.  I'm not sure how many movies fit in psychopaths, a half-dozen naked women, the sleazy sex trade in Los Angeles (right along Hollywood Boulevard, baby!), drugs and wise-cracking incompetent police all in the same story.  That's a talent only b-picture filmmakers can accomplish.  This one was released by Crown International Pictures, so you know right at the beginning you're watching a film that was made for the drive-in.  That means you're supposed to be fucked up when you watch it (I've been sober for fourteen years now, so I no longer have this privilege) and all the movie's economic flaws magically disappear.  The beginning and the end are clearly ripped off from Halloween, but that's about where any comparisons should end.  Don't Answer the Phone should be watched simply for the enjoyment of pure, independent sleazy filmmaking.  The kind I used to participate in!

Hohoho, merry Christmas.  Tonight, a cornerstone of the genre, Black Christmas

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